Taking the First Step
Let yourself breathe.
Start by breathing. After leaving coercive control, even the smallest step can feel overwhelming. A slow, intentional breath helps ground you—reminding your body you’re safe now, and healing can begin one breath at a time.
Give yourself grace.
This journey is complex—emotionally, logistically, and full of unknowns. But choosing to leave was an act of strength and self-worth. It’s okay to feel uncertain. What matters most is: you chose to care for yourself. That’s something to honor.
Self-Regulation and the Window of Tolerance.
When we experience trauma, certain situations can trigger our nervous system, pulling us into survival states. We may go into hyperarousal (fight or flight) or hypoarousal (freeze or shut down).
One of the most helpful practices is learning how to recognize these responses in our bodies and gently guide ourselves back to a calmer state—what’s known as the Window of Tolerance. This is the zone where we can stay present without becoming overwhelmed. Emma McAdam (@TherapyinaNutshell) explains this beautifully through a simple, powerful framework for understanding and managing stress in her video on YouTube here.
